My fiance and I have separate accounts and we want to get a joint account for one main reasons: Every month he writes me a check, I drive to the bank, deposit the money, wait for it to clear (one day or so), and then pay all of the bills.
The problem is debt and savings. The man has zero debt. ZERO. No credit card bills, no car loans (he paid off a $20K used car in one year), no loans period. I on the other hand have student loans, credit card debt (will pay it off by September, yay!), and a car loan. Even with all of that, I am the better saver. I have a pretty hefty savings account whereas he just started learning how to save properly.
In terms of saving, I think the joint account will be very beneficial because with our money combined I will be in charge of making sure we put enough away for savings. However, I don閳ユ獩 know how I would feel having a joint account where part of the money goes towards my credit card debt. The student loans and car loans I don閳ユ獩 mind but I am already feeling awful of the idea of 閳ユ甫sing閳?閳ユ笝ur閳?money to pay down my credit cards.
If you were in a similar situation, how did you get over it? What methods or plan did you use? Would it be smarter to just wait until I閳ユ獡 clear of credit card debt before joining accounts? What kind of conversation did you have with your spouse about debt?
And if you woke up on the wrong side of the bed, please drink your cup of coffee before answering =)
How to split the bills question got me thinking...need your input?
I am impressed that you are dealing with these issues.
It sounds as though you are probably more knowledgeable about finance than I am and most of those who are answering. I assume that you are asking largely for information on how this has worked in practice for people and what would be appropriate relationship-wise. The best resource for really talking this over will, of course, be your fiance.
If I were in his shoes I would want to use joint money to pay off the credit card debt. Since our money was now interconnected it would make sense for %26quot;us%26quot; to get that out of the way. Not every body feels that way.
My wife and I have had a joint account for a long time and it usually works out well. I have been thinking seriously about getting two accounts, however. This is not to seperate %26quot;my%26quot; money and %26quot;her%26quot; money but rather because we pay for different things and if we are both paying a lot in a few days it is easy to lose track of how much is actually in the account before we communicate. I am thinking it might be wise for us to have two accounts which we individually track.
As far as the drive to the bank goes ... it would be possible to have the money automatically transferred at the same time each month ... or use Quicken and transfer the money when you want that way. I also like Quicken because I can tell it to pay my bills at a certain time each month and then don%26#039;t have to worry about waiting until the money has been deposited to deal with it. I do it when it is convenient for me and then it is automatically paid when I tell it to.
How to split the bills question got me thinking...need your input?
I would wait until you get married to have a joint account, what if something changes, I don%26#039;t think your debts are a big deal if you are properly paying them, it helps build your credit.
How to split the bills question got me thinking...need your input?
We were getting married so we became %26quot;one%26quot; with our finances. SHE had more debt than I did and I didn%26#039;t mind that income from my job paid her debt! We are now out of debt except for the house! My wife stays home with the children and I work for a pay check BUT she takes care of all the finances at home! ! ! Works for us! You need to do what works for you!
My guess is he doesn%26#039;t care to help you out, he loves you RIGHT!
How to split the bills question got me thinking...need your input?
you are special and your fiance should feel lucky to be engaged to marry you....how refreshing to see a couple have an issue like this instead of the normal his money her money and neither the twain shall meet issue.......
If I were you, I%26#039;d keep separate accounts until after you are married, once married, use %26#039;our%26#039; money to pay down %26#039;our%26#039; debt.......he sounds like a keeper! Congrats and good luck!
Make sure you are on the same page as he is before you get married when it comes to using the credit cards in the future
How to split the bills question got me thinking...need your input?
When my husband and I married, our personal debts, including credit cards debts, became %26quot;our%26quot; debts, just as our personal incomes became %26quot;our%26quot; income, just as we became one. We both have access to all of our checking and savings accounts, even though we usually only get into the ones we brought into the marriage. It%26#039;s easier to manage that way as I don%26#039;t have to worry about overdrating %26quot;his%26quot; account and he does not have to worry about overdrafting %26quot;my%26quot; account.
How to split the bills question got me thinking...need your input?
my boyfriend just got out of debt...we plan on getting married within the next few years..one of our goals is for both of us to be out of debt... so to pay off my credit card debt (my dog had surgery) my boyfriend matches whatever I pay on my Capital One each month that way I am using my own money but he is also helping without me feeling like im using him or something... it%26#039;s worked out great so far... we both are huge on saving so he sees helping me out as a way of investing in the future... he%26#039;s a keeper :)
good luck!
How to split the bills question got me thinking...need your input?
We both like having our own accounts. It%26#039;s not because we don%26#039;t trust one another with the money. It has nothing to do with that. We just like taking care of our own responsibilities. I know we%26#039;re %26quot;one,%26quot; but that doesn%26#039;t mean that everything needs to be that way. I have a lot of debt like you, and she has no debt. I just would rather deal with my issues with my money in my account. It just makes more sense to us to have control of our own money. It%26#039;s just something that we%26#039;re used to, and it doesn%26#039;t hurt leaving it the same way. Is it wrong to have joint account? Of course not, but we just choose not to, at least for right now. There%26#039;s nothing wrong with your choosing to leave it separate for now. I know how you feel with all the debt crap.
Heath
How to split the bills question got me thinking...need your input?
unless you%26#039;re married i think a joint account would be a bad idea. for now try to keep your seperate debts seperate. after you%26#039;re married debts you take on together should be payed by joint account
How to split the bills question got me thinking...need your input?
i can tell you what my hubby and i do. he had no debt, i had a bit. we have MY account and OUR account. my hubby is not the greatest with money so i leave OUR account alone so if he spends it doesn%26#039;t affect the bills. i pay all of the bills out of MY account. my check goes into MY account, his goes into OUR account. i do transfer money from him if needed or if i have extra i transfer it into OUR accounts savings.
it%26#039;s all kind of become our debt now. since i pay all of the bills out of one account, i don%26#039;t look at is as his or mine anymore.
i know it%26#039;s kind of weird to have a MY and OUR account. it%26#039;s just that i%26#039;ve banked at the same place since i was 10. i am meaning to put his name on MY account (since it is still my original, it has my mom on it) but since they%26#039;ve developed online banking and direct deposit, i never go to the actual bank anymore to get the paperwork to add him.
best wishes
How to split the bills question got me thinking...need your input?
I am on my 2nd cup of coffee...
Anyway, my fiance %26amp; I have separate accounts also. He pays some bills, and I pay some bills. Have you asked your fiance how he feels about using %26quot;your%26quot; $$ to pay down you cc debt? He is marrying you %26amp; all your %26quot;baggage%26quot; per say. I did know one couple who the guy wouldn%26#039;t marry the girl until she paid off her student loans, he was a real dick about it too. I think you should talk to him first %26amp; see how he feels, and then make your decision. Also, it will be easier to wait til after you are married to have joint accounts. Another tip....always keep a separate savings for yourself, just in case. You can have a joint savings, and separate checking accts, but my sister (who has been happily married for 20 years) has always told me to keep my own savings acct.
How to split the bills question got me thinking...need your input?
first off.. YOU are NOT in a better situation because you have a savings account... that philosophy is WRONG%26gt;. your going to pay thousands of dollars more in your interest fees alone by keeping that money in the bank and not making more on your own loan payments... this is silly reasoning.your interest rate on your saving account is 3-5% annual.. your interest rate for that student loan is astronomical and student loans can never be covered under bankruptcy law.. so it will follow you everywhere til it is paid off including your tax returns being seized for it. you need to take financial 101
How to split the bills question got me thinking...need your input?
I did have a similar situation...The only debt I have is my car loan.My husband has a HUGE student loan debt, credit card and car..
I personally felt like%26quot; in for a penny in for a pound%26quot;, but he..like you, felt bad about that. So we have a joint account for household stuff...mortgage..utilities...ect... and then we have our own separate accounts
It%26#039;s worked for us so far
EDIT: We both have a set amount that we have direct deposited every pay period
How to split the bills question got me thinking...need your input?
I was in a similar sticky situation when I met my husband. I had been on my own in my own home for a while, but I had accumulated a little bit of student loan debt and I owed on my credit card. Before we agreed to sell our homes and purchase one together, combine our money, etc., I cleared up my own credit card debt and a portion of my student loans. When our money did go in together, I didn%26#039;t feel guilty about a portion of it going toward my student loans, because I was contributing money to the account----in essence I was still paying down my student loans. Have a good money talk with him and tell him how you%26#039;re feeling. It%26#039;s ok to be nervous about it, because money is a tough subject. Better to find out now where you both stand on the money issues so you can work together to come up with a plan that is comfortable for the both of you. Disclose how much you owe and your ideas of how to pay it down. Two heads are better than one, and if he%26#039;s going to be your life partner, I%26#039;m sure he will be willing to help you. He%26#039;s got great credit and is financially stable, so he may have a lot of good input for you as to how to go about doing so. Don%26#039;t be afraid to have the talk....honesty is part of what a good marriage is built on. This man loves you and he is your friend, so you shouldn%26#039;t worry about being judged. It will work out. Good luck, hope this helped!
I would take money out of that savings account of yours and put it towards you student loans/credit card debt. Get it paid down quicker. Money is a savings account means nothing if you%26#039;re in debt.
How to split the bills question got me thinking...need your input?
Ok it sounds like alot but it can work you keep your account and he keeps his you also open a joint checking and savings account (if they are all at the same bank it helps) on pay day you each deposit enough in the joint to cover household bills, each put 10% into savings and the rest in your personal accounts that way the household bills are payed out of one account and your debt can be paid by your account and he can have his own money and when you can afford to save more you do. This keeps things separate but equal once you get married you can change it or not. If this sounds like to much bank work then you can just divide the bills up and he can pay some bills and you pay the others
How to split the bills question got me thinking...need your input?
Since you are a responsible person that feels your bills ARE your bills to deal with, I would say to keep a separate account aside for yourself just to pay off your debt.
And if you have a substantial amount saved up in an existing account, then maybe only put into a joint account what your fiance is willing to put into it.
How to split the bills question got me thinking...need your input?
Well, speaking from personal experience, I would wait until after the wedding to consolidate your money. Once you are married, your debt becomes his debt and vice versa. It doesn%26#039;t matter that the debt was made before you were married. Once you are married, it should be %26quot;our%26quot; debt and %26quot;our money%26quot;. If you are better at handling the financial end, then you handle it. Whatever causes you both the least amount of stress is the way to go. I have been a stay at home mom for the last few years, and my husband earns our money, but I pay the bills and handle the money because I do a better job of it. Talk to your fiance%26#039; about it. Money can be a deal breaker for some marriages, so it is best toknow where you both stand before your at the altar.
How to split the bills question got me thinking...need your input?
Why not just open a separate joint account? That way each of you can deposit bill money in it when neccessary. No need to touch your separate savings or checking.
How to split the bills question got me thinking...need your input?
Well, you could combine all of the bills, including your debt, when you get married. Better yet, why not make a joint account for bills only, each putting in a set amount that adds up to 1/2 the monthly expenses (or however you are dividing it up according to your incomes). Don%26#039;t forget to budget in monthly deposits for annual or bi-annual expenses like insurance premiums. Agree on an amount to set aside as savings (don%26#039;t forget to discuss what the savings can and cannot be used for) and put that in a joint savings account. Then you can each retain your personal accounts for the rest of your money. You can add your debt to the monthly bills or pay it out of your personal account, whichever the two of you agree on.
How to split the bills question got me thinking...need your input?
This is kind of exactly why I asked my bill splitting question.
We pay seperately right now, he has a bit of debt, I%26#039;ve got none. And I was more able to pay more of the joint bills. He didnt want my money going towards his debt.
Now he%26#039;s making more in a month, than we used to make together so we%26#039;re trying to figure out the best system.
I%26#039;m interested in seeing what answers you recieve, too!
How to split the bills question got me thinking...need your input?
My husband and I have been married 4 years. The first year and a half we each had our own checking accounts and pretty much paid half and half like roomies almost. Then decided to just get a joint checking.. we did that for a year. Although it was convenient, I didnt like it, for I- simliar to you- am the better saver of us both. He at times would overdraft the account and I would have to put money in to cover the check I had already sent out for our monthly bills..
So now, we have a joint checking, I have my own checking and my own savings. He has his own savings as well. We pay half and half pretty much again.. ( I make more money than he does, so I pay a little more)
And I too, have credit card debt and charge cards and hospital bills I%26#039;m paying off, whereas he has no credit cards.
We see it as OUR debt and work towards paying it off together.. that way the higher our beacon score and the more money we save, the better house we%26#039;ll qualify for in a couple years..
Always have your own though. You never know what could happen.
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